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Friday, December 7, 2007

The Reunion

Puppies and Babies Photo Collection - Why God created pets?

Oh, Joanna just had a chat with me today through Yahoo Messenger. She is a distant friend working for care homes in Canada but no matter how many miles apart we are due to inevitable circumstances in life, she is always dear in my heart.

I heard she is coming over to spend Christmas with her loved ones. She found a new inspiration in her life there and that made me flash a wide grin in front of the camera earlier. She was happy to see the big smile in me and she reciprocated with a sigh, perhaps relieved knowing I was ready to accept her new found relationship. We haven't really talked much since she flew in to Canada to better her life and her daughter's whom she abandoned years ago under the custody of her mom. I told her how smart her daughter had become the last time I paid a visit back home. Then, she asked about my sister who is just a few years older than her daughter.

We talked about life, our struggles, our happiness, and the benign future we expect to be awaiting us. We ended the jovial conversation with my head inclined to recall one mushy yet glorious evening in my life.

After the duck hunt, a reunion with my family was about to unfold.

I wanted to go back home and the yearning to see my family again after being away for several weeks had been even more inflamed when I heard from a relative that my mom had just given birth to the only girl among my siblings. My happiness was beyond horizon but I felt bitter and hesitant still that seeing my family especially the newly born angel would entail enough courage from me. The fear I had for my inebriate dad when I was younger persisted in my teen life though he had started cutting loose from the intoxicating addiction. I had to gather my strength enough to humble before my parents especially my dad's high-and-mighty tower. I almost gave up thinking how to possibly push through with the plan that day. Almost feeling hopeless, I ended up drinking the ubiquitous brand of gin available in all the stores in the neighborhood with Brandon (Kuya M's younger brother) up until around ten p.m that night.

We had our usual talks of our lives, dreams, and youthful stories to tell. I felt comfortable sharing everything with him but not the secret I had been contemplating on earlier and was forging in the inward bravado in me. I never told Brandon I was going home on that dark night with the diminishing yet seemingly endless downpour. I left after our short drink and managed to wedge the bottle of glue inside my underwear. I got my hand on a bottle of a glue or a contact cement and though this skeleton of my past had to be resurrected, I had to succumb to its temporary effect to agitate the cringed fear inside me.

It was dark and I arrived almost drenched in the rain at the backyard of the house. Our dog was there but it never barked. It only gave me a whimpering sound and I felt how it missed me with his waggly tail, lunging it's head towards me. I decided to go near my parents' room to hear the crying baby. I was a bit drunk but it wasn't enough to boldly bolt me out where I was to see my parents face to face. The baby would continually cry but that was like sweet melody to my ears. I felt overjoyed knowing I already had a sister though was vaguely unsure if I could see how she looked. That made my heart melt still sensing if my moves would give me the expected end-product which is the longing to see my sister. I eased my face closer to the galvanized wall of the house and I could hear my mom trying to lull my baby sister to sleep. I missed my mom too as she was hushing the baby out. A spurt of emotions got caught in my throat and I remember wiping tears rolling out my eyes.

Braving myself enough, I took out the bottle of glue and a small plastic bag which I managed to obtain from the horse stable in the courtyard earlier. My spot in the back of the house was dark. The neighbors exterior bulbs and lamps a few meters away were not enough to illuminate my drunken self, my maniacal huffing of the glue. I remember talking to the dog then when my stupefied demeanor and mentality made the world stop. The last thing I recall seeing was the empty bottle of glue. I couldn't believe myself emptying almost a half-litter of bottle through huffing.

Next came hysteria, I was crying uncontrollably and so was my mom. My dad on the other hand was drunken, heavily snoring in bed like there's no tomorrow. He didn't see the drama. Nevertheless, I felt so happy making it inside. That was the first time I said "I love you" to my mom. My other brothers were there, one of them making me a cup of coffee. My sister was there, soundly asleep in the antiquated crib. I looked at my mom and she saw the eagerness in me. She motioned to me and I caught the angel in my palms. I was at home eventually sobered a few minutes before the daylight wrapped the darkness that canopied the recent events in my life.

31 comments:

paisley said...

what a wonderful gift of homecoming... i am thrilled you did not pursue your career sniffing glue,, i have tried huffing,, and i know it literally makes one seperate from their mind and body... very weird high....

LORD MANILA STONE said...

hi paisley, you are really a hero, thanks for the correction, oh my i should have written huffing but i didn't know that word,hahaha,i got it edited, i just realized it, hihihi, thanks again and i appreciate all your comments^^

LORD MANILA STONE said...

hi awannabe, i actually read your comments, i don't know why they don't show up here, my sister and i are around 18-19 years apart, thanks for the comment^^

LORD MANILA STONE said...

@pinoyskull

no problem here, i will have your link updated, thanks for the heads up^^

Malditang Pinay! said...

Hi Lord, you're story never ceases to amaze me I almost cried... ano ba yan!.. I'm really a big fan of you and I always enjoy reading your blog....

MONACO said...

That must have been a very tearful reunion. have you considered sending your story to 'maalaala mo kaya'? he he.

what about your dad? what happened, or am i getting too far ahead in the story? your mom's reaction was expected. all moms are like that, they can never turn away their children.

Iron Pugilist said...

An emotional drunk! And I thought I was alone in the world. Ah, I miss a good cry.

*Sparky* said...

Your story reminds me of the day my baby brother was born... a day I was relieved no longer to be "the baby". There's not such a huge age difference between he and I as there is with you and your sister. My brother is seven years younger than me. He was my mother's last child and has become everyone's favorite person. He grew up well, responsible, and seems to be the glue that holds the pieces of our family somewhat together.

My own addictions didn't come until later in life, when I was in my twenties... and although I've never tried huffing, I've done my fair share of experiementing and "dumbing down" to numb the pain of the reality I found myself in. It wasn't until I was well into my thirties that I had the courage and strength to shake off the addictions and start living life "aware".

Your trip down memory lane was probably more significant than you know...

*Sparky*

shiera said...

I'm glad you really did go home. ^-^
A mother's love is really unconditional... as portrayed here and as I have seen from my mother.
Despite all the hurts we gave her, this doesn't diminish her love for us.
My brother is still "lost" but my mother treats us all the same.

Marjie said...

awww..that was quite sweet. I'm so happy for your friend dear. I hope she has a wonderful holidays with her family =)

Kimchihead said...

Now that's a great photo. :-)

morinn said...

it's great that you've had a sister. i wish i had a younger sister too. i've tried glue sniffing when i was younger but then i gave up fearing memory loss. now i'm quite relieved from any addiction.

you have beautifully described your homecoming. i felt like i was there! ;)

Black_Mamba said...

Great story! It was a very noble gesture on your part. I think I'm much older than you are, but I never was able to muster up the courage to say those words to my mom..........

♥ KaThYcOt ♥ said...

hi there! ur tag! :)

bisdakbabbles said...

hey, LMS!
how are you?
it's been quite sometime since you've got a new post...
are you ok? hope everything's fine...
Merry Christmas!

Malditang Pinay! said...

Hello Lord, yes we miss you and wonder how are you? sulat ka na ulit!

Lotus Flower said...

Hi Lord,

How are you? I hope you are having a great holiday season:-)

Take care. A joyful Christmas to you and the people you love.

Cheers!

Lotus Flower said...

Hi Lord,

How are you? I hope you are having a great holiday season:-)

Take care. A joyful Christmas to you and the people you love.

Cheers!

Black_Mamba said...

Hello Sis.

Wishing you A Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year!

May God bless you and your family this holiday season and always.

Ivy
:)

Nick Phillips said...

Hi, Just dropping a line to wish you and your family a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year !

Male Beauty said...

Hello hello!! I just want to stop by to wish you a very Merry Christmas.. enjoy and have the best of everything!

Mwah!

Lizeth said...

just want to greet you a merry christmas!! enjoy the holidays!

GAY BIPOLAR GUY said...

Merry Christmas!
http://llerrah.com/newyearwishes.htm

bisdakbabbles said...

hey L.M.S!
How are you? hope you're ok...
Happy holidays!

reyna elena said...

lord: you must be busy these day! but this is off topic:

just wishing you the best of the year to come! happy new year at salamat ever sa support!!!

Malditang Pinay! said...

Hi Lord, it's been awhile asan ka na miss ka na sa blogworld... Happy new year!

shiera said...

Hey LMS!
Happy New Year!
where are you? are you ok?

*Sparky* said...

Just dropping by to let ya know I was thinkin' 'bout ya this morning. Have missed seein' your posts. The absence is noticed.

Wishing you well,

*Sparky*

reyna elena said...

AVA! Mag-vavalentines na! Sobra sobra nang around the world to! hahaha! Tinag kita dito!http://reynaelena.com/2008/01/21/ten-royal-questions/

bisdakbabbles said...

hello LMS!
How are you?
I do hope nothing serious happened.
The fact that you still approved a comment around a week ago is a good thing.
But I do hope we could hear from you again...
a bit worried here. I hope and pray you're doing ok...
Take care!

Anonymous said...

Were you also taken for a ride by Migs, the manilagayguy? http://antimgg.blogspot.com/